Weeks 37 and 38.

Alright, again, this has taken me awhile to summarise and get up here on my blog. It's hard to believe that, as of when I am writing this post, 37 weeks is a month ago! At any rate, at 37 weeks +2 days, I had an OB appointment... and our first cervical check. That was certainly interesting (not too painful, but not very comfortable). Dr Hoang said my cervix was still closed, maybe dilated to 1/2 centimetre, but he didn’t think I’d make it to 40 weeks! (Sidenote: Too bad that estimate was off!) They finally did an ultrasound to estimate his weight, he was at 5.5 pounds, so Dr Hoang thought he’ll be around 6 pounds, 12 ounces to 7 pounds, 2 ounces by the time he’s born! :) Speaking of weight, I had only gained 1 pounds in 3.5 weeks, so that was a relief- I totally had thought I gained 5 pounds, but I guess he really had just dropped and that was the “weight” I was feeling! ;) And the best part was that the doctor was totally down with our birth plan when we shared it with him! :D He didn't just glance at it, either. He spent time going over it, and expressed his concern over a couple points (like taking photos/videos of the birth, which the hospital does not allow, period :|). So that was reassuring, for sure.

The next night (Friday), I woke up choking and hacking on my own vomit. After aspirating barf into my lungs, I had to induce full-blown vomiting into the toilet to even get any sort of relief. I got very little sleep, though gladly, Kevin can sleep through nearly anything (so long as I reassure him I’m fine). :P

At 9 AM (Saturday), we went to “part deux” of the hospital childbirth education class, which actually wasn’t so bad that time around. I was very glad that the nurse was very adamant on explaining how breastfeeding is the only way to go (“unless you’re shooting up heroine or doing cocaine, of course”) and that breastmilk should be the norm. (I always have thought it’s weird that people say it’s “best” and put it up on a pedestal- no, breastmilk is just what we should be automatically feeding our children, and formula should be considered the last-ditch artifical option, like it is.) Of course, we practised some relaxed breathing, though I couldn’t really get into the relaxation because Kevin kept teasing/interrupting me and saying: “Don’t fall asleep!” (Grrr, seriously?) I love him though. :) At any rate, after the breathing exercises, we were supposed to get down on our backs and “practise” coached pushing. Uhm, no. Don’t get me wrong- if that’s how I want to give birth, I will, but I definitely don’t want someone counting to ten and it just makes sense that upright positions are the best for pushing and giving birth (not lying on your back like a disabled turtle, closing off your pelvis and making it difficult for Baby to squeeze through)! So, I just rested for a few minutes while they all practised putting their chins to their chests and counted to ten three times. Haha.

After receiving our certificate of graduation from the class (and an evaluation form that I readily filled out!), we went to lunch (of course, it was around 2-230 at that point, and both of us were starving)! I got this “feeling” that Kevin’s parents might be at the same place that we were going, and sure enough, there they were! So we chatted with them for awhile.

Later that night, we had to go to a bridal shower for one of Kevin’s many cousins- we got her fiance and her a 3-piece cookie sheet set and a 6-piece Pyrex storage set, and boy, did I have fun trying to find something to wrap it with. :P We can’t come to the actual wedding (which is on 17 September), so despite being literally exhausted, we both decided it would be the good thing to suck it up and go to the shower. Happily, it was a BBQ co-ed luau (much like our baby shower), and it was a lot of fun. Of course, I got a lot of people ooo-ing and ahhh-ing over my belly, and a few relatives were taking "birthday bets." My in-laws hoped he would come on 26 August (my father-in-law’s birthday), and a couple cousins said the 2, 16, and 19 September. (Sidenote: Looks like the folks who guessed I would go early, including my doctor, were totally off, eh?) I told the cousins that I sure hoped I wouldn’t go to the 19th since that would be 2 weeks “overdue”! :P At any rate, we headed home around 945 PM, totally depleted.

By 38 weeks, the exhaustion had really started to get to me. Every single night, I would wake up with acid reflux, itching all over, and HOT. I'd walk around the house, have a drink, eat a graham cracker (settles the acid?), and then try to lie down again. And this is AFTER I take 25 mg of diphenhydramine (the stuff that makes you sleepy in Benedryl)...

Saw the doctor again. He did a cervical check, which was a tad more painful than the previous time- my OB seemed a little more nervous than usual, but I suspected it was because he had a surgery to go to in less than an hour. I had gained another pound in a week (UGH!), which depending on my pre-pregnancy weight (I’m not really sure where I started) brought me up to a total weight gain of 22-32 pounds. SAD! After his check, he told us he could feel the baby’s head, that I was still about 1/2 cm dilated, about 65-70% effaced. He predicted that the baby could come during week 39. (Sidenote: Sadly, this prediction was off, once again.)

Afterwards, we had dinner. When we got up from the table, I suddenly got these horrific sharp, shooting pains (kind of like charlie horse cramps) in the tendons between my upper-inner thighs and pubic area (like the bikini line area). I could barely make it to the car, and was breathing so hard to calm the pain that my husband was sort of in shock. He thought I was having contractions. No, Hunny, I’m just a wuss, I suppose. :P

Because I thought we would be having the baby the following week, I got working on packing a hospital bag:

-A little outfit packed for Lucas (both NB and 0-3 sizes, socks, hat, and blanket).
-5 pairs of Depends underwear (yeah, I said it).
-My mini-toiletries bag.
-Camera (charged).
-3 copies of our birth plan.
-1 copy of hospital pre-registration paperwork.

I don't really remember much more about this week, because I was in THE worst funk ever. Even my doula started pissing me off, and she's one of the nicest and most sympathetic women. All I wanted was my husband with me, day and night, so I started feeling so lonely while he was at work. (I wonder if this is some sort of animal instinct?) This is the week that the pain became commonplace, exhaustion was typical, and I began feeling like I was pushing everyone away. Oh, and I started wanting to devour the kitchen. Not really hungry, but like OMG I JUST WANT TO EAT. Sigh...

I'll be updating with weeks 39 and 40 soon, hopefully.

Weeks 35 and 36.

I am so bad about putting my thoughts/progress into one lump sum of a blog post. Anyway, week 35 brought a lot of the same symptoms that I had mentioned before, especially insomnia due to reflux (it gets so bad that sometimes I'll throw up involuntarily!). Also, We had our second prenatal "class" at our home with our doula. The topic was breastfeeding. Quite interesting to practise baby holds with a creepy smiling doll. Haha. We finally received our car seat, and Kevin installed it in my car. I swear, everytime I get in my car, I have a mental freak-out. ("What the heck is that in my backseat?") On that Saturday, I decided to participate in the Team in Training 5K with my dear friend Katie T. She was so awesome for walking with me the whole 3.1 miles (and most of it was surprisingly a trail route- something I'm not very apt at, so to speak) in 80-85 degree heat. We finished in 53 minutes, which is definitely nowhere close to a PR (but shockingly, I finished ahead of 20 other participants- 78 out of 98). The biggest weight off my shoulders during week 35 was finishing my birth plan...

By week 36, Baby Boy dropped. Like a bomb. I didn't realise it at first, but as the week went on, my shirts started fitting wonky (belly hanging out), and I began feeling shooting/sharp pains in the hoo-ha area (almost like a UTI?). I was pretty sure I lost my mucus plug, but I couldn't really be absolutely sure. By the end of the week, I was feeling awful. I started getting these horrible groin cramps (like a "charlie horse" in the tendons between my upper-inner thigh and pubic area), stopping me dead in my tracks and unable to continue walking. To top it all off, our washing machine started leaking everywhere. UGH! Okay, but anyway... Awesome things that happened this week? My mom got me the BOB 2011 Fitness Strides jogging stroller, the nursery dresser was delivered (all 190 pounds of it, which my handsome hubby so deftly transported from the garage into the baby's room with only a mini-cart to help him), and we received a Moby Wrap in the mail from Kevin's boss. :)

End note: I will write up a summary blog for weeks 37 and 38 soon. I swear, all I do is sleep these days!

Our Maternity Photos!

Here are the rest of the photos taken on 28 July, at 34 weeks, 2 days pregnant, by our friend Amy: Lily's Maternity Shoot! Can you believe that she is not a professional photographer?

Weeks 32, 33, and 34.

Wow, so... Week 32, I had an ultrasound at my OBGYN's office. My weight gain is starting to "mellow out," so to speak, which is not a bad thing since I am up 20-25 pounds (not sure how much since I didn't really weigh myself pre-pregnancy). We discussed some of my birth preferences, and it seemed like he was pretty much on board with a natural birth (even if it will be in the hospital)... As for symptoms, I'm still dealing with major reflux, insomnia, and as of week 32, we noticed "leaky teats" as Kevin so cutely calls it. Haha.

Week 33 was a total whirlwind. First of all, after many cancellations and mishaps, I finally got to have a childbirth education class with my doula! It was great because she came to our house, where we could talk and laugh and relax in the privacy of our own home. Also, our baby shower was planned for 33 weeks, 4 days, and boy, was the planning sheer insanity. My mom was so awesome and had several people cleaning and fixing up her house for the party, and even put up water misters since the weather station had predicted triple-digit heat! My baby shower hostess (Stephanie) did so much too: buying decorations, getting favours, ordering chairs/tables, and of course, all the food. A couple days before, I started getting worried, because I found out that we were going to have to pay a large chunk (350$ + 100$ from invitations)- and after a lot of self-analysing, I realised that it wasn't even about the money, after all. But even that worked out, because my mom was so generous that she paid for all the catering. (o_o) Can I just say AMAZING?!

At any rate, I could go on forever about the details, but in the end... the baby shower was utterly amazing. Yes, there was lots of drama and no, it didn’t go perfectly (100-degree heat was pretty bad). But it was such a blessing to be in the company of such amazing friends and family, and we were literally “showered” with gifts. Seriously- it was shocking! :) Thank God for all the love. Now I must take on the daunting task of figuring out where everything is going to go, as well as purchase a lot of our essentials (car seat, dresser, organisers, etc) for Lucas’ room. I was walking around in my heels so much that I honestly felt like a cripple for the next couple days. Haha.

Anyway...Can I just say: I love that Lucas has the hiccups so often. Poor little guy. But Momma thinks it’s so cute. By the way, my belly measurements are up by 1.5 inches from just a few weeks ago- we found out after playing the "guess Momma's belly measurements" game. He is definitely getting bigger! But evidently, my friend who had only seen me in photos thinks that I “look bigger on Facebook than in person”! Haha, that’s not something you hear everyday!

Also, here are some of the amazing photos that one of our lovely friends took at the shower: Kevin and Lily's Shower. Her photography throughout the day was like a gift of its own, since we hadn’t met her until then (she is my husband’s former coworker’s wife)! She got some really cute unplanned “maternity” photos for Kevin and me. :) Here are some of my (less impressive) photos that I got: Our Baby Shower.

After walking around in kitten heels for 5-6 hours while heavily pregnant and mingling with guests (I kept forgetting to sit down, relax, drink water, eat, everything- haha), my sciatic nerve was so shot that I slept maybe a grand total of 2 hours for the next few days after the shower because I was so uncomfortable. I could hardly walk! My right foot went into a “charlie horse” cramp, and my second toe curled up all funky. It was quite odd… and quite uncomfortable!!! It’s amazing how much the body (and mind) changes while pregnant.

Speaking of “the mind” changing, that reminds me of something cute and funny that happened at the shower. Kevin’s cousin Misty has a ~9-month-old little girl who is sooo precious and (in my opinion) looks like one of those adorable troll dolls from the 90’s (a compliment, I promise you). Well, I guess Misty was telling me something, but I was totalllllly zoned-out on her daughter (tickling her little arm, waving bye-bye, talking to her) and hadn’t even heard what Misty said. When the baby girl reached out to me so I could hold her, it was heart-melting, because Misty said she never lets “new people” hold her. Kevin and Misty just laughed and said: “Yep, the ‘Mom Bomb’ has gone off!”

Now that I am in my 34th week, labour is becoming more and more real- I really need to put together a “birth plan” soon, if I am going to. Had my last ultrasound to check if there was enough amniotic fluid to last until birth, and the doctor said everything was good! Baby Boy is still measuring small (33 weeks, 3 days instead of 34+), so the doc doesn’t think he’ll be more than 7.5 pounds at max! But… ya never know.

I have only gained 2 pounds in the last 5 weeks, thankfully; it seemed like my first and second trimester I was just gaining and gaining non-stop. I know he is bigger, though, because my waist measurement went from 37 inches to 38.5 inches in the last month or so! I only know that, though, because I measured myself randomly out of curiosity at around 30 weeks, and then we played the “how big is the momma’s belly?” game at our baby shower. Haha.

We discussed my preferences for birth, and I’ll be honest… I am rather apprehensive. I do like my doctor, and I think he is more open than some providers. However, he seemed pretty set on doing an episiotomy at any slight sign that I may tear. And I still haven’t even talked to him about my other wishes (delayed cord clamping, delayed weighing/measuring/vaccination, continuous monitoring, etc). I guess this is where I am glad that I have a doula, as well as a husband who is on my side when it comes to my preferences. I know I cannot plan out Lucas' birth perfectly, but I want to make it the least traumatic as I can. For those moms who have given birth naturally in the hospital (no pain medication, induction, or augmentation), what are some good ways to positively express my wishes to my doctor? To the hospital staff?

Welp, tonight I am probably doing maternity photos with my hubby. My sister's lovely friend offered to take them for me, as she is down in Bakersfield to visit. Hopefully I'll be able to edit this blog post to post a few of her photos later! :) I will end this blog with an amazing quote I read by childbirth "expert" Ina May Gaskin:

"Remember this, for it is as true as true gets: Your body is not a lemon. You are not a machine. The Creator is not a careless mechanic. Human female bodies have the same potential to give birth as well as aardvarks, lions, rhinoceri, elephants, moose, and water buffalo. Even if it has not been your habit throughout your life so far, I recommend that you learn to think positively about your body."

Weeks 30 and 31.

These last couple weeks have been busy, busy, busy. During week 30, I spent my 4th of July weekend with my in-laws and a couple of their friends. We headed to Lake Nacimiento in the RV, toting the boat behind us. I was eager to get a little sun and try out my new maternity swimsuit. Despite not being able to do any waterskiing or wakeboarding (I don't really like doing either, typically, anyway), I did enjoy going out on the boat. I think Lucas didn't know WHAT to think, as we bounced over the water. However, it was great to get out and swim around a bunch- "they" say water is good for a pregnant woman, and I think they're right. ;) I thought it was really special when my sister-in-law got to feel Baby Boy having the hiccups. By the end of the weekend, ultimately, I was exhausted, though. My back was really acting up on the trip home, and I was glad to be back in the air-conditioning (even if it was 107 degrees outside at home)!

Oh, and did I mention that we went for a 3D ultrasound? It was a bummer that we didn't really get a clear picture of his face, since he had his hands and arms in front of it! However, we did get to see him blink, yawn, and munch on his hand, not to mention him showing off his little boy parts! And now, the horrible reflux I've been having makes a little more sense- the ultrasound technician immediately noted lots of hair on his head. No wonder I've been downing Tums like it's going out of style! :P Here's the video my husband caught using his iPhone:



The weekend of week 31, I spent time at the coast with my mom's side of the family (my grandma, aunt, sister, male cousin, uncle, and my female cousin + her two precious kids). My cousin Lindsey and her kids Bailey (age almost 3) and Oliver (age 1) live in Australia, where her husband is from, so I rarely get to see them (the last time was August 2009). In fact, this was the first time I got to meet little Oliver! It's always pretty hectic when it comes to my family (no, seriously, NO ONE ever ends up agreeing on what we're doing), so by the time Sunday rolled around, I was emotionally and physically exhausted. My family and I spent a lot of time walking around at farmers markets in Morro Bay and San Luis Obispo... and every night, I totally conked out back at the hotel with my hubby. I think I experienced my first noticeable Braxton Hicks contraction after a particularly crazy day of bouncing a baby (Oliver) and trying to help my cousin manage a sassy 3-year-old (Bailey). ;) Also, I noticed lots of belly cramping and my sciatic nerve was just going crazy. :( I'm almost "beached whale" status with this belly! Haha.

Yep, so... that's all I can think of for now! I know, I know, not very detailed, but I'm too tired to think clearly today. Bye for now!

Yes, that is our baby boy's hand during the ultrasound at 30 weeks, 2 days!

Weeks 28 and 29.

Pregnancy is becoming more and more real everyday. Not only did I find an outcropping of ruby-coloured stretchmarks extending across my ever-expanding fleshy buttocks this morning (29 weeks, 5 days), but acid reflux has become a daily plague that causes me to burp and vomit at the same time (morning, noon, and especially at night). In fact, one night, I "slept" in my husband's recliner because otherwise, I am sure I would have drowned in my own stomach acid. Mmm, pregnancy sure sounds fun, right?

Sorry for the negativity- that is probably attributable to my up-and-down rollercoaster hormones, which have kicked into high-gear. I can be okay one moment, and then a bawling mess the next. It takes a lot of energy to keep from just going nuts on myself and on my husband. I'm getting butt-hurt over the small, insignificant things. (Wow, yeah, my mind is still on those ugly butt stretchmarks, can you tell? >:|)

The 20 of June marked me going on disability leave, and though, YES, I KNOW IT'S EARLY (seriously, stop making me feel even more guilty about it!), I am glad that I have taken this time for myself. The stress and physical pain I was feeling at work was just not worth it, I realise, and I am glad my doctor was the one who flat-out suggested that I go on leave. At any rate, that doesn't mean that I'm not bored as heck, but I'm trying to start reading up on what to expect from birth and motherhood, and just finishing up projects.

On that note, we finally got our co-ed BBQ/pool party baby shower invitations sent out, and uhm, wow... lots of people were invited. I know most of them will probably not come, but stil! Let's hope no one brings any booze! Also, Kevin and his dad finished painting Lucas' room, and now I just feel that much more excited about his arrival.

We saw Dr Hoang at 29 weeks, 1 day, and now that I've decided to find out my weight everytime, I am thankful to say that my weight did not go up (in fact, it went "down" by .6 of a pound) in the last couple weeks. I'm just trying to be more conscious of when I'm eating, and of my snacks (fruit instead of jellybeans and frozen yoghurt, Subway 6-inch veggie sandwich instead of hospital cafeteria lasagne), because Lord knows, I don't want to gain more weight than I need to. (Plus, everyone seems to think it's a great idea to rub it in that the last trimester is when you "really start getting big!") Despite that, I am still not okay with what my lower half is doing (seemingly ballooning up)... and that was just compounded when I tried on a maternity tankini swimsuit earlier this week. I spent the rest of the night sobbing my eyes out, after discovering several stretchmarks running down my thighs under my butt. And yes, I know that sounds ridiculous, but I have to be able to mourn the loss of my body, even if Lucas is our blessing and miracle.

At any rate, I talked to the doctor about my birth preferences (heplock/no IV, intermittent monitoring/being able to move around, and having a doula with us) and, in his words, he said: “I want this to be your best da_n pregnancy, so we have no problem whatsoever with allowing you to do whatever you want, as long as everything is going fine.” He seemed totally open about my doula being in the room and about going naturally (WITHOUT pitocin)! :) PHEW! What a weight off my shoulders, and I’m so glad that he is understanding. Let's just hope the hospital is equally respectful...

Weeks 25, 26, and 27.

As shown in my last post, the last week has not been easy at all. Since the 5th of June, Kevin and I have been in deep mourning for the loss of our baby girl cat Minnie. It pretty much affected my ability to function or focus all of this last week. Two days ago (Thursday), I went in to the OBGYN a week earlier than expected, as I was having severe back pain. We had an ultrasound, and Baby Lucas is doing very well. However, my doctor advised me to go on disability leave. I'm still contemplating it, while I have a doctor's note for the next week.

During this appointment, like all OBGYN appointments, I stepped on the scale backwards. I expected the medical assistant to just nod, and say "Okay," and then I could put my shoes back on and be DONE with the worst part of the appointment. But no, this time she had to announce my weight to me. And it is HIGH. Higher than it has ever been in my life. After panicking a whole lot, I got up the nerve to ask my OBGYN if I was doing okay, and even went so far as to ask him if he would tell me if I was gaining too much. He said my weight gain was fine, and that he'd only mention it if I gained more than 20 pounds in the last 12+ weeks. At any rate, I am still not happy with what I weigh, and my thoughts are pretty much on two things: 1) having a safe, healthy, calm, and prayerfully natural birth... and 2) losing this baby weight while breastfeeding and getting back to training!

We interviewed our second doula yesterday, and she sounds like she might be "the one" for me. Kevin isn't so sure. But I love her philosophy on things like circumcision and breastfeeding. Not only does she provide 2-3 prenatal visits, but also 1-2 postpartum visits... and 1 full year of breastfeeding help. Which, considering I want to breastfeed and train for events again, I will need help, I'm sure. I have a feeling that she'll be helping me know just how much I actually need to be eating to produce a good amount of milk.

We decided to paint Lucas' room, so the bottom quarter of his room is a light blue and there is a dark brown border at the top. We'll be decorating with the turtle and polka-dot appliques. :) We also got the baby shower invitations in the mail, so I've been trying to slowly get all the envelopes addressed.



But yep, pretty much, I'm just more winded from any sort of activity, my back hurts all the time, and oh, I think I have some really itchy spider veins (let's pray they aren't actually tiny stretchmarks) on my outer thighs. Pregnancy has been harder than I thought it would be, and I don't feel like the blissful mommy-to-be that I should be, especially considering we tried for Lucas for so long.