17 April 2011

Weeks 18 and 19.

Argh! I just haven't felt like blogging lately, to be honest. But let's see... I've been having the same sort of symptoms like exhaustion, insomnia, and cramps when I sneeze, cough, or stretch (and sometimes when I just turn the wrong way).

During week 18, Kevin and I went to a huge consignment sale called "Little Feet Repeats"! While there, we checked out all sorts of gently/never used furniture, bags, clothes, and toys. We ended up getting six receiving blankets, a swaddling outfit, two little outfits, a diaper backpack (in lieu of a diaper bag), and a few maternity outfits for myself. :)

As I write, I am 19 weeks, 5 days pregnant... and things are not easy. I will be honest, I am having personal difficulties with not allowing my fears overwhelm me. Will I be a good mom? Will I ever be able to run again? Will I ever be considered "thin" again? What if (UGH, I hate those two words!) I fall victim to the enemy again? Will my husband and I stay close after he is born? I mean, I know these things ultimately don't matter if I can just give birth to a healthy little boy, but I guess it's that perfectionist in me that God is still working on changing that keeps popping up.


At any rate, we had our fourth ultrasound on Wednesday... and our baby boy is DEFINITELY a little boy. :) So, on that note, we have finally determined his precious name- Lucas Dean. <3 Dean is a middle name that has been passed down through several generations in Kevin's family, and Lucas is just a lovely name and has a great meaning. I hope you like the name too, but if you don't... that's just too bad! ;P

2 comments:

  1. Your baby is beautiful, Lily, as are you. I can only imagine some of the concerns you have, but I can say that I don't like the "what if's?" because I often worry about things that... either are irrational, or things that are currently not in my hands, things I don't need to worry about so much, ect. My thoughts are with you <3 Lucas Dean is a beautiful name, and he has a amazing, strong mama ;)

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  2. Adorable baby bump! And great name. You would be abnormal if you didn't have fears! You were created and blessed with freedom to use it for greatness!

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Gimme some love! <3